Science and Nature

Maxine the Vaccine

You’ve heard me tell of Cyrus
The virus who’s so cruel.
Who makes so many people sick
And stops you going to school.

Well I’ve got news for Cyrus,
For a valiant hero’s come,
To break his crown, to blunt his spikes,
To kick him in the bum.

Maxine the vaccine,
Her quest is to protect us,
Her lance is sharp, her aim is true,
She’s racing to inject us.

Her mystic, magic potion
Will create an army, teeming
With her antibody buddies
Like a suit of armour gleaming.

The battle will be loud and long,
Whamoozle! Bash! Kerpow!
So wash your hands, as you’ve been told,
Just like you’re doing now.

Then give a cheer for Maxine,
She’s our vaccine superkid.
She’ll dump Cyrus in the dustbin
And superglue the lid!

Cyrus the Virus

Cyrus,
The virus.
He’s nasty and he’s mean.

Cyrus
The virus.
So small he can’t be seen.

He lurks on taps and toilet seats,
He really loves the loo!
On bannisters and handles,
Whatever can you do?

Wash your hands! Wash your hands!
Make him squirm and make him struggle.
Wash your hands! Wash your hands!
Send him glooping down the plughole.

He wants to make us cough and choke,
He’s really a disgrace.
If he gets onto your fingers,
He could end up on your face.

Wash your hands! Wash your hands!
It’s the thing he fears the most.
Wash your hands! Wash your hands!
And we’ll make this Cyrus toast!

We can thwart his evil plans
So remember – WASH YOUR HANDS!!!

Steel Don’t Float!

So here I am
On this great big boat,
But it’s made of steel …!
And steel don’t float!

Call the captain!
Tell the mate!
S.O.S.
Before it’s too late!

No doubt about it,
This boat’s going down,
‘Cause steel don’t float.
We’re all gonna drown!

Those engineers,
They just don’t think.
A boat of steel
Is bound to sink.

Does a cannonball float?
Or a 50 pence?
Metals always sink,
It’s only sense.

So here I am
On this great big boat,
And it’s made of steel …
… So how does it float?

An object will float if it is lighter than water or, more correctly, if its density is less than that of water. Although steel is much heavier than water a steel boat, because of its shape, also contains air so that the ‘density’ of the boat, as it pushes down on the water, is less than that of water, and the boat will float.

The Sub-Atomic Particle Zoo

Please don’t give buns to the Boson,
When you visit the particle zoo.
And avoid feeding figs
To the one known as Higgs,
For the keepers hate sweeping up poo.

Avoid having lunch with the Lepton,
You might be leapt on if you do.
But the Tau, for some hay,
Will point out the way,
While the Muon will just stand and chew.

The Quarks in the duck pond are dabbling,
Bottoms up and tops down, two by two.
And the grumpy-faced Gluon
Is giving his view on
What’s right, and what’s wrong, and what’s new.

When you pass by the hadrons and mesons,
If you’ve time and there isn’t a queue.
Can you ask them, with tact,
How they all interact,
‘Cause I honestly haven’t a clue.

Sub-atomic particles are particles which are smaller than atoms. The elementary sub-atomic particles currently known include six types of Quark (called Up, Down, Bottom, Top, Strange and Charm), six types of Lepton (including the Electron, Muon and Tau), twelve types of Boson, including eight Gluons, plus the famous Higgs Boson. The elementary particles can combine to form composite sub-atomic particles such as protons, neutrons, hadrons, baryons and mesons.

 

Science Stinks

Science stinks

And that’s not all.

It fizzes, flashes, bubbles, bangs,
Grows, glows, pulls, pushes,
Moves, murmurs, hums, growls,
Crawls, creeps, bleeds, breeds,
Tries, tests, bends, breaks,
Makes, mends, clones, cures,
Probes, peers, seeks, finds,
Clears, steers, leads, links.

Don’t you love it?

Science stinks.

First published in ‘Read Me at School’, edited by Gaby Morgan, published by Macmillan, 2009